"Do not pity the dead, pity the living and above all… those who live without love."
It’s Just… Searching
Its bright, I close my eyelids but it does not help
I place my head into my hands
It’s hot but I can not drink water
I will miss you, but I can not say good-bye in that moment
We get mixed up in each others eyes
I don’t want any of this to change
Next to you, the world greener
Next to you, the sun is warmer
Around you, I begin to realize what happiness is
When you’re here beside me
Around me …Near me …
Lazily, I hold my breath,
Nothing is possible, I go deep into the consciousness where
There are highlights, pink, that seem to glow
And the rays of the sun softly fall on your face
We get mixed up in each others eyes
I don’t want to loose any of this
Mixed up our eyesI don’t want anything to change
All of our lives, we search for something, something to fill the hole in our hearts. Something that makes our world greener, our sun warmer, and something that makes us realize what happiness is when we are around it. For most of us it is another person and this person seems to give us the world of happiness, but of course that comes about when we are older. Sure now in these teenage years we may think that someone is of great importance but it is more complicated when we are at this age. There are not many teenagers that have grown enough to realize the importance of one person (or of anything really) and I think that is the most dangerous thing of all. A wise man once said “If we don’t know what’s important, we lose sight of who we are.” and I think that ties well to what I just wrote. See if we don’t know who or what makes us happy then how do we really live? How do we know what to seek and what not to? There are many of us who know do know who or what makes us happy, but most of the times, the problem is we are not able to seek it.
Which brings me to my second point, what if we DO know what makes us happy but we can’t get to it? Or we are not allowed to seek it? What happens then? Well I honestly don’t know. I would personally fight my hardest to get it, even though in my circumstance it is almost impossible to obtain it. Still, I pour all my efforts and fight with all my power. But what if I – or someone else – is unable to get this “wonder” that creates happiness, what happens then? I have thought about it and I came to the conclusion that we must live with that fact. I know that it pains us to look at it day after day, weeping in sorrow and deep thought, but its not healthy to dwell on it. So, we must look it in the eye and come to a closure that we can’t have it. I mean we did this several times as kids’ right? We would ask our parents if we could get the shiny new toy that everyone had on the block. When the answer was no, we would cry and cry but eventually we would get over it. We would find another toy that would make us happy. We learned to do this as kids, so we must be able to do it as adults, even though we have grown up and the circumstance is a little different. And of course it will pain us terrible to do so and tear us in to small bits and pieces, but eventually we will be content. After all we must do this in order to survive, otherwise we would dwell and dwell upon it and only hurt ourselves in the end.
Sure this is easier to do if your happiness comes from something that is materialistic. So I wish luck to those who must cope with the fact that the person they want – the person that brings them eternal happiness, joy, the person who makes their world light up – can not be theirs. I wish luck to those who will continue to fight for it, knowing that their end result will be failure. But another wise man once said “Help will always be given not to those who need it, but to those who deserve it.” And that wise man is me, Oh So Oso…