A Life for the Living

"Do not pity the dead, pity the living and above all… those who live without love."

How To Live

While doing some research for my auto biography, I came across Dalai Lamas 18 rules for living.

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

3. Follow the three Rs: 1. Respect for self 2. Respect for others 3. Responsibility for all your actions.

4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

8. Spend some time alone every day.

9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.

10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

11. Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.

12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.

13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

14. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.

15. Be gentle with the earth.

16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.

17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.


I think these are wonderful ways to live a life, each rule has a wonderful moral that should be followed. While reading this list I thought about how this could apply to my everyday life and I saw that these are little things that I can do every day. Some of these I already do but I think that if we are raised with these rules, all of our lives would be much different. Think about it. If every single person followed and did there part to be gentle with the Earth, we wouldn’t be running out of natural resources right now. Or personally, if I only dealt with the current situation in disagreements with loved ones, I might still have somebody I hold most dear next to me. And if we all follow these rules, then we understand one another and nobody takes advantage. In the future, I am going to try and raise my kids with these rules and hopefully they will lead a more full life.

What I really like about these rules is that neither of them contradict one another. People right these ways to live a happy life but most of them contradict one another. Something like “Live life how you want to but work hard to play hard.” How can you base you life on something that is contradictory? It just doesn’t work. I just wish that some of these rules were a little easy to follow and I keep looking back to number 13. We as humans are taught to look back inorder to see the future. So when fighting with someone we love, we look to the past for guidance. While looking to place forgiveness on someone, we always look back to see if they deserve it. But while only dealing with the current situation, we might overlook the crucial details that were left in the past. Like in a book I read: a husband cheated on his wife and she forgave him only because she loved him. She overlook things that happened in the past and found it in herself to give him one more try. Unfortunately he took advantage of that and soon after he started cheating again. Poor woman. All she could do was sit with her hands folded and say “Men never change do they”.

Its a cruel world we live in. People jump each other for the next big thing or the next big opportunity. They would kill one another if it wasn’t illegal. If only we all lived by these rules, life would be so wonderful but unfortunately we do not and it is meaningless to hope and wish.


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