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"Do not pity the dead, pity the living and above all… those who live without love."
They say that all good things must eventually come to their end and now it is time to say good bye to this wonderful school. This year was though with the constant reminder that I am a Senior and graduation is eminant. I think if it wasent for this class, I wouldn’t be able to get through the year. You see, our meaningful conversations made me understand life more than I already do and for some reason they always related somehow to what I was going through, seperation being the most prominant. But besides the wonderful conversations we had I loved the books that we read because each one had something to teach us and each one made me tweak my morals. Siddheartha took me through his life and aged me mentally by the time I finished the book and The Count of Monte Cristo actually aged me by the time i had finished. Reading in this class not only bettered me morally but also it got me reading other books that were not assigned. When I was a kid I loved to read and over the years I lost that love but most recently (due to this class) I have found that love again and I hope to never loose it.
The blogs were probably my favorite part of Ms. Lahaises class just because neither of my past English classes had an ongoing assignment that was all about getting in touch with the world and, most importantly, with yourself. I can say that if it was for my expressing myself over these blog posts, I would have probably lost my mind this year. In extension, ever since I have been writing in this class (blog posts, journals, essays) my writing has dramatically improved and I have found myself to be an (amateur) writer. I always sort of knew that I had a passion for the written word but in this class I discovered my mediocre talent that I hope to improve it as I should continue with this class.
Looking at my last years blog post I had written:
“For many people in Ms. Lahaises class, this will be their final blog post and they are going to leave their blogs (as well as the class) forever but I am thankful not to be one of those people. I am glad that I will be continuing on with this class, with the great books that we read, with the great blogs that we write, with the exciting conversations we have, and the interesting TED talks that we watch. For this class is unlike any other I have encountered and I hope it stays as such when I come back to it next year. So, farewell until then and I hope next year you will still remember me being, Oh So OSO ”
But I unfortuanlty cannot write that this year. I am unfortuantly one of those people who will be leaving which means, no more TED Talks, no more blogs, and no more Ms. Lahaise. I am leaving my comfort zone and it honestly scares me. I dont know what is going to happen to me and the uncertaintly is unbearable but as long as I have my friends and family to get me through it, I should survive… Hopefully.
Requiem By Vahram Petrosyan
Stop, listen, to my requiem of love
My scars, your faults
Those I cannot account for
There is no longer any love,
Do not speak there is no need to make empty promises
I will return to you only…
Chorus: If you do not pain me
No, by me forgiving you I am fooling only myself
In this freedom I am in torture
No longer come near me
There is no longer any love,
Without love I am dieing
But now I return to you
Oh how you hold our loves past memories
Two unacquainted people
We are stangers to one another
When you rise to the sky, your judement will come
And I now forgive but I beg
“Lacrimosa dies illa, qua resurget ex favilla judicandus homo reus”
(On that sorrowful day, guilty man will rise from ashes for judgment)
Although this song is sung by Lilit Hovhanisyan, I didn’t think that it would be fair to give her all the credit for this song. It’s more important, in my opinion, to give the credit to the person who actually wrote the song since he did such a wonderful job. ‘Till now the lyrics sort of ring in my ears and bring forth all of these emotions that compile on top of on another and again I feel compelled to write a blog about it. All of his songs sort of have the same theme but each one is remarkably different. On that note I would like to tie it in with my previous blog. Previously, I wrote about those certain relationships that cause so much pain but it is impossible to leave I want to continue on that and write about what happens when you DO leave.
My entire blog has been my circumlocution, my round-about words about “certain people” and “some of us”. Since this is one of my last blogs, I think I am just going to cut all of that out and say what I really need to say. Going back to the story about my friend whom I left. After I went away, there was this whole in my heart. Like this song, I kept making excuses about how I can return but I know that I am only fooling myself – things would never change. But I tried to help him find his way back, some how, some way, back to the friendship we had. But I failed and I was left with the memories of our past. I held them in my hands as if they were hot coals, giving my warmth in all the coldness but burning my hands at the same time.
I thought about what it might be like if I did go back, if I gave him a second (more like tenth) chance to change his selfish ways and to take me in his heart. But like the song, I kept on contradicting myself. I knew it wasent possible and I was only torturing myself with the idea. I think the thing that got me over it the most was I thought “He is probably off playing basketball not even giving all of this a second thought. So why am I?” And after that, things sort of got better. There was no longer any tortue in my freedom, there was no longer this pull from my heart nagging to make things better.
I sometimes take a glance into his eyes to see if he thinks about it but its sort of interesting, he prefers the pain that remained from the ashes of our friendship rather than the urge to patch things up. In his eyes, I see all the pain I caused him, all the confusion, all the madness, and all of the heartbreak but I do not see a light. All I see is the sorrow and the emptiness. The will to fight has disappeared I guess but yet he still lingers. A day will come though. The sorrowful day and on that day when guilty man will rise from the ashes for judgment.
I Left You One Day – Lilit Hovhannisyan
I left you one day,
Burying my love, my heart, under the darkest soil
For me to forget and to never return to the joyus, playful life
Which is now dark
I left you one day,
Changing my life, giving it a new meaning
And now I leave each day forgetting you
How was it that your soul and your heart was fading whilst beside me?
Being blinded, being crushed
Loving has become difficult
And without you it is hard to live
But by leaving you, I saved myself
I saved myself from the endless fights,
There is no need for that in love or life
By leaving, I freed myself from your hell
Your lifeless looks where the death of me,
Your kind words were my birth,
How could you hurt someone who saved you from life,
There was no need to believe your lies
Or to gift my love to you without thinking
Because the truth is, I wont even get to see you smile
This is another of my favorite song writers songs. I love the way he writes because even though there are some little things lost in translation, he still has a wonderful way with words. He some how, to me at least, has a way of painting this picture in your head and represent feelings in a way that I have not seen before. This subject is rather interesting. He writes about how a particular individual brings him so much pain yet he cannot leave her. He writes about the pain it brings him and how he leaves but even then it is hard to live without that person. That’s what I hate the very most. The truth is, we all have that someone. That select individual that brings us an infinite amount of pain yet we still love them and we know that deep down they do too. I myself have a great amount of experience with that subject even at this young age. The person being someone who can’t or wont change for whatever reason. A person who has an empty heart and really doesn’t care who fills it. A person whom I loved very much. You see, in theory we would be good friends. He could be like the Little Brother I always wanted and I could have been his older brother. Closer than just friends. Brothers. But it could never be. And upon hearing this song, I am reminded of him.
The limited amount of time we did spend together in our two year friendship, the moments that were not fighting, those few select moments that we were actually happy – I remember them like it was yesterday. I remember helping him and bringing him out from all the darkness. I remember being a guide to him which gave me the ultimate happiness. I remember loosing him to a force greater than myself and then upon his return I remember asking him “Please don’t leave me like that again. Please don’t be unkind to my heart. Please stay beside me.” I remember his response “I promise. You are a special type of friend that only comes by once in a lifetime and for that I am grateful.” Although he didn’t say it exactly like that, that was the gist of it. Then there were the fights. I remember he used to smile and I would forget all my anger but the interesting thing was that after a plethora of fights, that didn’t exactly work anymore.
The thing I remember most is leaving. “I’m going.” I said ” I can’t take anymore of this” and the truth was that I couldn’t. He had his ‘girlfriend’ now and he can only give his true love to one or two people at a time. Who was I to gain some of his undivided attention or love? Nobody. That’s who nobody. When somebody else came into the picture I was nobody. I was sacrificing my life for him and he was throwing me away to the sidelines. So “I’m done” I said in hopes of him saying something to change my mind but he didn’t. He let me walk out of the door and later he would talk to me about it “I let you leave because I know that without me in your life, you could live happily and I am just ruining your life. I know that I bring you a great amount of pain and I don’t wish to cause you anymore. So I am letting you go. I know that I will never be the person you want me to be and for that I am sorry.” I couldn’t move, I was frozen by his words. “There is nothing to be sorry for. It’s all in the past now. I had seen our future and it wasn’t that bright.” I have a way of telling what was going to happen in the future and from what visions I saw, it wasn’t that great. I saw him commit a betrayal greater than anything he had already committed. “Do you know what I see? I see a future with us apart and us loosing one another. Then I see me finding you in all the people of this world, coming to you, but I wouldn’t be my old self. I would be the person you always wanted me to be.”
I almost cried inside. I thought why couldn’t he be that way now? Why was it going to take all those years? The truth is that those were probably just words to get me to think kindly of him because that’s all they ever were. Just words. Nothing of real substance and now I am left here thinking about all the joy, happiness, and light that we could have experienced with each other. I know he doesn’t think of it but I honestly don’t care because while he is destined to be my bane when together, he is my reason to keep fighting on when apart. To keep fighting for a future like that. A future with happiness. Love. Life. Brothers.
I wanted to take this blog to talk about something that never seems to be mentioned anywhere something that most people don’t even know about. The pain of so many people, which seems to be ignored. To the Armenian people it is known as the Armenian Genocide and this is our story. Almost a century ago, we were deceived, we were tricked and our land was pulled out from under us like a carpet. The unfortunate thing is that this three-year genocide has been ignored as has been the lost lives of the many people massacred. Interestingly enough, Hitler used the Armenian Genocide almost as a springboard for the Holocaust. “Who, after all, speaks today of the annihilation of the Armenians?” With these words, he reassured the Nazi’s that they would not be caught and that their crimes against humanity would go unpunished as it was done with the Turks of the Ottoman Empire.
Since 1524, the Armenians were loyal, law abiding citizens to the Turks of the Ottoman Empire but they were still considered to be second or even third class citizens and not of equal status or of the same stature of the Turks. After a while it seemed to bother the Armenians that they could not get the jobs they wanted or purchase the land that was rightfully theirs due to their unequal standing beside the Turks. So around the year 1800 they asked for their civil rights and protested that they get equal rights. This lead to many small peaceful protests being turned into riots and many small massacres. The Turks were furious, that the Armenians were “stepping out of line” so in 1896, more than 250,000 Armenian citizens, intellectuals and any persons who tried to fight for civil freedoms were killed. Things only got worse from there.
In 1908 the Young Turk Revolutionists came to power, claiming that they could bring change ad overthrowing the Sultan in the process. The Armenian people rejoiced to the fact that these Young Turks were going to bring change; they had no idea that it was for the worse. So in 1914, the Ottoman Empire entered World War I and suffered a very bad defeat at the hands of Russia. The Turks were angry about their defeat but they knew that this would be the best time to execute their plans. Slowly they started rounding up the Armenians and getting ready for their extermination. The Turks started to evacuate the Armenians from their land with the excuse “its for your protection from the war.’ Then they took their firearms with the excuse “we need weapons for the war”. Lastly they separated all men under the age of fifty from their homes with the excuse “we need solders”. Then on April 24, 1915 the slaughtering began. The Turks murdered all teachers, priests, and any other person smart enough to foil their plans or fight back.
With the remaining people, they stated what is now know as the “death marches” which were systematically planed routes through the Diyarbekir and Deir ez-Zor deserts designed to slowly kill of the Armenian race. By means of torture, starvation, thirst, or firing squad the Turks began to climate everyone. Some were not so lucky, small children were rounded up and buried alive for complaining about lack of water and food. Pregnant women were considered a game, bets were placed as to the gender of the baby and then their stomachs were ripped open to see who was correct. These are a few examples survivors who lived to tell their stories of the horrors they remembered.
By 1918, the death marches had stopped and it was estimated that 1.5 million people of the Armenian population were killed. The Turks were angry that they weren’t able to be rid of the whole Armenian race and so they hid the fact from the world. They told lies about how it was a war and that Turks were also lost in the crossfire because they didn’t want to be responsible for the pain they caused. Even until today, Turkey glowers at the mention of the Genocide of the Armenians.
As I type this blog, the Turks are in my homeland, where my father’s father was raised and where the bodies of my own are buried. They took everything from us and left us close to nothing but they too, deep down, are ashamed of what they wrought. If you visit on of the twelve provinces of Armenia where the Armenian people were forced to leave, you will see that the Turks haven’t touched a single house. Everything remains the same, almost like a ghost town. But the unfortunate fact of the matter is that the Turks are never going to accept the Genocide because of political, SoCal, or economical matters and if it is not recognized within two more years, it will be forgotten. Us as a human race would have let the Turks get away with this hate crime. For the Armenian people, this story will stay in our hearts and we will pass it on from generation to generation so that everyone will know that the world let Turkey get away with this mass murder, extermination, this Genocide of the Armenian people.
Recently, I have been looking around and seeing all of these people being filling for divorce or people who are already divorced. So recently I started thinking about what it might be like when I’m married and if I would make the same mistakes. Then I went online and searched for the top things that can split a mariage. I came across this website and decided that I could use them in my relationships with people as well as disperse it to married couples to make their marriages can be better. I copy and pasted an excerpt from the article down below.
1. Talking badly about your spouse. One of the things that my husband and I agreed on when we got married was that we would not talk badly about each other to other people. When we have a problem we discuss it with each other instead of others. Occasionally we discuss problems with family but try to focus on positive attributes as well.
2. Repeating the same behaviors. If your spouse is constantly asking
you to take out the garbage can or you continue to use the same degrading tone then you are showing your spouse that you are not willing to change. You are in effect saying that you have no remorse for your actions. It is hard to break bad habits but being willing to try is half the battle.
3. Talking at your spouse. Oftentimes one partner will talk at their spouse instead of with their spouse. Talking at your spouse means that you don’t take time to listen to the other person. You tell them what you want or expect instead of discussing the situation. This type of talk puts your spouse on the defensive and is insulting. If your spouse is tense and avoids conversations chances you have been talking at them instead of with them.
4. Not listening. Listening is so important. That means when your spouse is talking that you stop and really listen. It is so easy to tune a person out when you are busy or the subject matter is not a topic you are interested in. My husband loves jeeps and dirt bikes. As a result his conversation often revolves around these topics. I really try to listen to him because I know it is important to him, even though it doesn’t interest me much. I now know quite a bit about the topics myself.
5. Not saying please and thank you. It is easy to forget these simple words. But using them acknowledges that you appreciate your spouse and recognize the things that they do for you. It also shows that you are appreciative instead of demanding. Your spouse will be more likely to do things for you when you say please and thank you. Read More…
I find that most of these habits are the tiny cracks in the mirror that eventually break it. Think about it. How can you be married and not have respect for one another, or trust one another, or not listen? Why get married at all? I think that these little habits are important to think about while in the couples stage. If more than three of them are being executed then I think marriage is not an option. There are so many couples in the world that get married of the sake of being married either because of their culture, age, or longing to fill their empty home but thats not right. People should get married under the right circumstances. Love. Respect. Mutual agreement. And most of all, equality.
Now I am certainly no expert on marriage but I have seen a plethora of them in order to form this opinion. A mariage cannot survie unless there is equality among the spouses. But thats not to say that both have to work the same amount and bring the same amount of income and split everything 50/50 because that also has its problems. I am saying that each spouse has to have their own part, their own share in making a house into a home. It can’t be that one cleans the house while the other goes and wrecks it or while one saves and the other spends it. Nor can it be while one turns the house into a home while the other sits and does nothing. Each has to bring something to the table. That is the foundation of a GOOD marriage.
Then in order to have a GREAT marriage, there must be something in between the spouses. Be it love, kindness, or respect there has to be some sort of feeling felt by both. More importantly, it has to be expressed. Sure, you could say the words all you want but those are sort of a short term feeling. It is only with actions that you are able to project how you feel. You have to let your spouse know how much you care and how much love you are willing to give out. Or in other situations, how you respect who their space and respect them as a person. Without any sort of emotion tied into a marriage, the foundation doesn’t matter.
If all that has passed then there is the matter of maintenance. Small things like being able to solve problems in between and knowing when its time to bite your tongue, after all, there is the matter of spending the rest of life with one another. There is also the matter of actually SOLVING problems rather than pushing them under the rug. Love and respect are very powerful but without talking with one another to solve problems, all of these unexpected feelings rise up from the past and then it becomes unclear why things feel that way. No, it is much better to solve through a problem rather than evade it because even outside of marriage, it has been proven that bottling up feelings or acting like they are thrown away creates problems in the long run.
So there you have it, Oso’s advice on how to keep a marriage together. It’s unfortunate I can’t start preaching this stuff, not that anybody would listen. There are so many people who I see that don’t deserve to have a marriage and then there are those poor souls who are so longing to have one but aren’t able to because they haven’t met the right person. I just wish and hope for those people so they can be happy.
One of my friends actually sent this article to me, knowing that I would be very interested in the subject. This article is all about how you can distort and filter the way your brain picks up information as well as choosing which information to pick up. And then it goes on to list the tell-tale signs of hidden anger. I am unsure why they are on the same page but its ironic that they should be. Recently, things have been up in the air with the people I deal with on a daily basis and when I read this list, I was able to further understand those people. I looked at a couple in particular.
— Being Right: When someone is continuously trying to prove that they are right. Even if they know that there is the slightest possibility that they are wrong, they know in their mind that it is unthinkable for them to be wrong. So they will go to any lengths to demonstrate that they are indeed right.
— Fallacy of Fairness: When someone is resentful because they think they know what is right and what is fair but that might not be the case. Still, that person cant help but feel resentful because they feel that what they know is fair when other people might disagree.
— Personalization: When someone thinks that everything people talk about or whatever they do, is some kind of reaction to them. They think that everything someone how connects to them. They also compare themselves to others, seeing so is smarter or who is better looking.
It’s hard to deal with those certain types of distorted thinking. Although most of us have moments when we become one of the above, there are people out there who live with this filter full force and it gets to you a little bit you know? It’s like how many times can you fight with someone that they just might be wrong or that although some people dont agree, what you think is fair, or worse when someone is constantly thinking that you are doing or talking something about them. How many times can you keep reassuring that person that you aren’t talking about them? And what if you can’t one day? What happens? To be honest, I can deal with a lot of different personalities but sometimes it just gets to you. Even then… I don’t know. I just feel in a daze of some sort. At another glance through the list, I picked out the filters that I personally apply to my self.
—Fallacy of Change: When someone expects that other people with change inorder to suit them. They think that if with time and with enough right amount of pressure that others will change eventually. These people feel that need to change others to suit them because they think that their happiness depends entirely on the other person.
—Blaming: When someone holds another person responsible for their pain and that the other person is the only one who can reverse it. Or they blame the pain on themselves and try to find a reversal within themselves.
—Mind Reading: When someone, without anybody saying anything, knows what other people are feeling. They know why they are feeling as such and why they act the way they do. To be even more specific they are able to feel how another feels towards them.
To be honest, the last one doesn’t seem like a way of thinking. It seems more of a gift and there are a couple more on the list that seem more like just gifts. Anyway, these distorted ways of thinking actually come in handy some what. Some of them just seem distorted but others seem like they sort of enhance your way of thinking and help you to look past whats on the surface. So what might seem distorted might actually be just an enhancement.
Recently, I have found myself full of doubt. It’s like all of the things I have done in the past are coming back to haunt my very being. Was I right to let go of the one person that harmed me, who was also my greatest joy? Was it right for me to do something terrible as long at it was for a few seconds of pleasure? I am doing or living my life the right way? How can I be certain? I cant, and thats where all of this doubt comes from. It comes from all of the memories and all of the darkness which floods every single empty void in my body and makes me shiver, hairs standing on end. Doubt, in and of itself, is a nasty feeling. It goes hand in hand with jealousy yet this feeling lasts terribly longer because there is no real way to resolve it.
The worst type of doubt comes from the relationships you hold with people because that type of doubt almost never finds a way to resolve itself. You never really know if someone was going to betray you. You can never be certain if that person was going to love you. And above all, you can never be positive that the decision you made was the right choice. It hurts me terribly to feel all of these things but its a part of everyday life, without doubt as your guide, you are lost. It helps you make sure that what you did was the right thing to do. If you feel doubt, then it wasent. So I think that the most reasonable thing to do is go back and undo what you have done.
Doubt is something that is definitely unavoidable but you can make it easier if you walk into something with a clear head and mind. Cut all loose ends before starting something new so you can walk into something and be certain of it.
Oh my how I adore StumblUpon! This time while stumbling upon websites I came across one that was rather interesting. It was all about how to “hack your brain” as they described it and it was something I really needed actually. You see some people, like myself, are bombarded with millions of thoughts. If I were to keep track on paper of all the thoughts that ran thought my head in five minutes, it would fill over ten pages front and back. You see, it’s a sort of curse that courses though my body. Although it give me the ability to expect the unexpected, I find my brain thinking the same things over and over again and sometimes it feels like my brain is about to fry. I find myself not being able to find peace because there is always something on my mind and even if I write it down or talk about it; whatever is on my mind sticks there. Forever. Sometimes there seems to be no room for anything else. So you can imagine my relief when finding this article.
So the first method it speaks of is called priming your brain, which involves associating a certain, feeling with a word or repeating a set of words to get you on to that track of thinking. Like saying, “I don’t need that extra piece of pie” but I guess it only works when saying it out loud and actually seeing the phrase in front of you. Taking it even further, you can “hack” your brain to associate certain objects with certain feelings but the article says that you can’t make yourself do what you don’t want to. So your emotions cannot get in the way but it also contradicts itself, describing how you can channel your emotions to feel a certain way. With all that said I think I am going to try this out myself. Maybe I can teach myself to forget things that have past but if I am thinking about it, I’m not really forgetting am I?
That’s what I hate about all of these psychological theories and methods. They all contradict one another and nothing is ever certain. I feel like you can really do anything and there are no boundaries or limitations. Although in this article they set up certain cannot and do not rules but they go on to contradict themselves and reveal loopholes. So there is really no solid way to hack your brain, its all trial and error. I also feel like if you know all of this information then you know you are hacking your brain and if you know, is it really working? It’s like knowingly taking a placebo, does it or will it rally work in that case? Again its hard to say and it seems like nothing is for certain, but I am going to try these out and see what I come out with. Someone was able to hack my brain once so lets see if I am able to do it myself
While doing some research for my auto biography, I came across Dalai Lamas 18 rules for living.
1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
3. Follow the three Rs: 1. Respect for self 2. Respect for others 3. Responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
I think these are wonderful ways to live a life, each rule has a wonderful moral that should be followed. While reading this list I thought about how this could apply to my everyday life and I saw that these are little things that I can do every day. Some of these I already do but I think that if we are raised with these rules, all of our lives would be much different. Think about it. If every single person followed and did there part to be gentle with the Earth, we wouldn’t be running out of natural resources right now. Or personally, if I only dealt with the current situation in disagreements with loved ones, I might still have somebody I hold most dear next to me. And if we all follow these rules, then we understand one another and nobody takes advantage. In the future, I am going to try and raise my kids with these rules and hopefully they will lead a more full life.
What I really like about these rules is that neither of them contradict one another. People right these ways to live a happy life but most of them contradict one another. Something like “Live life how you want to but work hard to play hard.” How can you base you life on something that is contradictory? It just doesn’t work. I just wish that some of these rules were a little easy to follow and I keep looking back to number 13. We as humans are taught to look back inorder to see the future. So when fighting with someone we love, we look to the past for guidance. While looking to place forgiveness on someone, we always look back to see if they deserve it. But while only dealing with the current situation, we might overlook the crucial details that were left in the past. Like in a book I read: a husband cheated on his wife and she forgave him only because she loved him. She overlook things that happened in the past and found it in herself to give him one more try. Unfortunately he took advantage of that and soon after he started cheating again. Poor woman. All she could do was sit with her hands folded and say “Men never change do they”.
Its a cruel world we live in. People jump each other for the next big thing or the next big opportunity. They would kill one another if it wasn’t illegal. If only we all lived by these rules, life would be so wonderful but unfortunately we do not and it is meaningless to hope and wish.
So I came across this article while on StumblUpon and it sort-of opened my eyes. It lists 10 psychological states that someone has felt but has never found something to call it. I will just give you a quick summary of a couple of them.
Dysphoria: is used to describe the feeling of sadness that also includes restlessness and random irritation. This emotion is usually the cause of deppression, a distressing situation, or extreme bordem.
Enthrallment: the feeling a step up from happiness. A feeling that uplifts you and raises your mood tremendously. This emotion is usually felt when you see something amazing or great for the first time like a concert or a rocket taking off.
Normopathy: this idea was created to describe the need to be “normal” or the need to fit in with everybody else. Many people experience this, even if it is very minor, at various point in their life while trying to blend in a new social surrounding or while trying to hide practices they preform which most people would condemn.
Abjection: this is an emotion which is felt by every human durring infancy when you come to the realization that your body is seperate from your mothers. As a result we have a sense of horror that we carry with us throught our lives. This feeling is also later felt when you see a dead body because you realize that the person laying there could be you.
Sublimation: was created to describe the use of sexual desire towards doing something productive. This is usually felt when you have that weird intense passionate feeling to write or do what you are good at.
It is interesting that while we feel these feelings very frequently, we dont even know what they are called. I am glad I read this article because now I can call my feelings something because for some reason it always interests people. “Whats wrong” they ask, so now I can answer “Nothing. Im Dysphoic” or “Nothing I am just Enthralled”.